Terror.

It was all the feline's fault. We should blame her for everything. It's the way she meows for food, meows for attention, and sleeps a lot. While she is sleeping in the sun, she absorbs the sun's heat and gets really warm. Then, she runs amok and releases all this stored heat, causing global warming. Global warming will kill us all next week. It shall sneak up on unsuspecting pedestrians and eat their faces. And Ella is all to blame.

The faceless population will also be affected by another disease, which has its roots also in the Ella creature. The hairs covering her face contain a virus which will be spread amongst the human race, causing them to grow large amounts of facial hair - furry face cancer. It is impossible to be both faceless and have furry face cancer (this is because of the nature of the thing; without a face, one cannot grow facial hair), but nonetheless, it shall happen. When everyone has both diseases, then a new disease shall mutate out of the pair. Calling the Disease Center will avail in few results: there is no treatment for this disease, since the disease itself has yet to begin. This deadly new disease is called Penguin Death Syndrome, or PDS for short. PDS will cause its victims to grow penguins out of their orifices. This painful disease will always result in death, and the cadaver will reanimate a short while after. This "zombie-penguin" of sorts will have only one objective - to spread the PDS virus to more humans. Basically, we are all screwed.

The cause of all this suffering lies with Ella. In case the reader is not aware, Ella is my Siamese cat. She meows a ot, sleeps a excessive amount, and carries a host of infectious diseases in her fur coat. I enjoy telling her that she will make a nice tube sock one day. She replies by either ignoring me or meowing in terror. Such a nice kitty.